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Embracing the Softness

Embracing the Softness

I look different now than I did before I was pregnant. My feet are bigger (that’s one they don’t tell you) and some parts are…softer.

Last week I ran across a statement that Jessica Alba recently made regarding her body before and after having a baby. It wasn’t a super political statement, she just acknowledged that her body was different and it wasn’t going to ever be the same.

The thing is, that is kind of a revolutionary idea nowadays.


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Our celebrity and youth obsessed culture puts so much importance on the size of a woman’s waistline (or thigh, or breast) that even the most natural act in the world – a mother creating life in her womb – is seen as detrimental to her value as a woman because it makes her “fat.” What other conclusion can you make when the cover of every magazine aimed at your gender screams out “So and So Back in Her Bikini Three Weeks After Giving Birth.”

I am never going to wear a bikini again. I am that mother who declares she “just had a baby,” even though that baby is now 3 years old. I’m okay with that.

Sure, I spend time at the gym trying to lose the baby weight and I work at eating healthier. But I don’t do those things because I’m worried about fitting into some stupid swimsuit. I do them because I want to be healthy, fit, and have lots of energy to keep up with my little one.

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I do them to set an example for my daughter that beauty is running, jumping, having fun. Enjoying life to its fullest and laughing the whole time.

It is NOT worrying about those soft parts.

[box type=”1″ class=”rounded-5 shadow” width=”480″] For some true inspiration on body image and the important role mothers can play in shaping the next generation of women, read this mother’s lovely promise to her daughters.
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View Comments (8)
  • Have you seen this blog? I lurve it. https://theshapeofamother.com/

    I know I will never be the same, but after my first child I was DARN close.I was actually thinner when he was 18 mos than I was when I got pregnant. HOWEVER. Children 2 and 3 (and c/s 2 and 3) have pretty much done me in.

  • Theresa – I had not seen that but thanks for sharing b/c it is awesome! Also, I think the c-section is the kiss of death when it comes to getting back your old body. I’m not sure that little muffin top ever goes away 🙁

  • Softer but stronger! I absolutely loved being pregnant and motherhood brings on a new level of confidence and strength. It’s all in how you perceive yourself no matter if you are fluffy or fit.

    • So true Sonia and something I guess I implied but didn’t state. Motherhood has definitely given me a confidence (or is just an “I don’t care what others think” attitude?) that I didn’t have before. It certainly helps you prioritize your concerns.

  • So true! I was shown http://www.theshapeofamother.com by a Sympathizing friend after I found out that I was pregnant. I was very scared and even depressed to see how extensive the stretch marks can be… At 25 and with a college degree I knew nothing really of the effects of motherhood on woman’s body! We keep it a secret as if it’s something shameful. So I showed the site to my husband and made him aware of th possibl changes and of course of my enormous sacrifice in th name of having a family ;)). It really helped though! he was searching all over net finding remedies to prevent stretch marks, and not so much because he would have a problem with my strechmarks, but because he now knew what I was going through.

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