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Priorities and Pull-ups

Priorities and Pull-ups

I hate pull-ups.

I really do. They did absolutely NOTHING for my three girls when I was trying to potty train them.

Wow! Fancy diapers!! Now I can wet my diaper like a BIG girl!

You can imagine that this attitude tended to be slightly irritating to me. More expensive, less to a box, and my girls all treated them as a diaper upgrade instead of training pants.

Forget that. And so, when it came time (b/c I really do put it off until my kids are practically begging) to potty train, we went straight to the real thing.

You cannot even begin to imagine how many little girl panties we have around here. (And by the way, I really hate using that word on my blog, but it just loses impact if I use ‘underwear’, doesn’t it?) Panties themed by days of the week, Hello Kitty, Strawberry Shortcake, Dora, Princesses, the Wiggles (which a friend pointed out to me is totally weird and creepy…a picture of five men on little girl panties? That’s just wrong.), panties with flowers, polka dots, lollipops, etc.

I have been on so many special big girl trips to choose their favorite first panties that I could write the book on it.

And I have almost made it. The Promised Land is nearly in sight to my weary budget.

So close, and yet so far away.

You see, my problem is with THIS little darling:

She seems to have a certain fondness for changing into new panties multiple times a day. She knows I won’t just let her change 10 times for the fun of it, so what does she do? Makes it imperative that she put on a fresh pair. Multiple times a day. Every day. (and before you suggest that I just let her have a free for all and change to her heart’s content, trust me…I’ve tried that, too.)

The other day I asked her WHEN she was ever gonna stop wetting her pants. Her answer?

“When I’m a big sister.”

I proceeded to hand her a value pack of panties and a few diapers to keep on hand ’cause that ain’t happening’, sister.

Now of course at night things are different. I can hardly fault a child for not having bladder control while unconscious, now can I? My solution is to just continue to invest in the bargain priced Costco diapers for as long as necessary at night. No big deal.

But wait! In the world of my 3-yr-old, this is a VERY big deal. A travesty, in fact. A heinous war crime beyond description.

She looked at me two nights ago with shock and dismay written all over her face. Her little brows furrowed and her hands crossed over her chest in slow motion. She planted her feet shoulder width apart, glared at me from across the room, and communicated non-verbally that I was now the scum of the earth (she gave me the 3-yr-old equivalent of the finger…sticking her tongue out at me).


I meekly and submissively appealed to the volatile dictator before me.

It pains me to no end to have to present you with these, these contemptible forms of waste containment, these diapers. But my lord, I beg you, have mercy, for my storerooms are empty and Costco is closed. I would be forever in your debt if you could so humble yourself and don this horrid diaper for a mere evening. Please, my liege, grant your humble servant pardon for this grave oversight. It shan’t happen again if you but spare my life.

It wasn’t pretty, the battle that ensued. I will not go into details, but I will tell you that it eventually involved duct tape. A lot of it. And later that night when I went to make sure she was okay before I went to bed, she had STILL somehow managed to rip it off and was sleeping with a smile on her face. I will never forget the panic, the pure fear, the nausea that welled up in my whole being as I looked into the pull-ups basket and found it dismally empty that night.

It won’t happen again, I can tell you that. Yes, they’re about $10 more than the stupid diapers, but at some point I have to put a number value on Mama’s nerves. A fight over pull-ups vs. diapers? No thank you. This humble servant will gladly concede that battle for the greater good: world peace in my home.


View Comments (4)
  • You are so funny!! I have a 3 yr. old doing the EXACT same thing right now!!

    Does she old do well in public? Mine wets on purpose at home so that she can change a thousand times of day, but in public…she does just fine. FIGURES! lol, we spend most of our time at home.

  • i had a friend with a similar situation (repeated wettings so her son could wear all his favorite undies). she remedied the situation by buying white underwear. in the morning, he put on a favorite pair, but when he had an accident, he wore white undies. within 3 days, the multiple accidents were over.

  • You gotta figure out what the child’s currency is, and use it, unashamedly, without fail. Kids figure out any weakness in parent’s armor and use it with ruthless abandon. But you also have to wait until they’re really ready, and take as much conflict and confusion out of the mix.

    I was in charge of potty training my brother when I was 12 and he was 2. Then I had to train my kids. My son was 3 1/2. We tried months before, the old “potty train your child in less than a day” routine. He was semi-successful. But when he got it, he got it. Same with my daughter, but she was the stubborn one. We tried at 2, but she was having none of it. I tried leaving her in a wet or poopy diaper for hours, hoping the precious blue eyed blonde would be disgusted and beg to wear Princess of Power undies. Nope!
    Six months later we were visiting friends and their son was in process. She finally got it. On the way home, my very articulate daughter asked if she could go peepee in the potty and wear big girl panties when we got home. Uh, SUrE! She did and never even wet the bed after that. Huge relief! But we never had pullups which I now believe are the product of Satan.

    Last weekend my 3 yo nephew came to visit for a few days, sans his daddy and very pregnant mama (twins!). He is fine with the pee part (his daddy taught him to pee off the porch at their cabin in the woods, but he is adamant about the poop. He will have nothing to do with the potty chair or the toilet).
    We went to Costco and found an 8-Pk of Cars underwear. He was so excited to put them on the next morning. He did great, for about four hours. Earlier I had told him if he pooped in the potty I would give him a special treat. Slyly, he asked what it was, as though weighing if it were worth it. A surprise, I replied, with as much excitement as I could muster. Sadly, he didn’t do so well, but I have high hopes with consistency he will soon get it. His mommy would like a gap (now ever-decreasing) of time when she doesn’t have to change diapers before the new babies come.

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