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Mom Crazy

Mom Crazy

My little baby started her first day of preschool today. Which means that I, of course, cried. I can honestly say that I was not a crier before I became a mother. I 100 percent, totally blame motherhood for this curse.

I don’t cry all the time but I definitely cry more now and it’s always over my daughter growing up. She may have left for her first day of preschool, but I swear when she turned around to say goodbye I saw her leaving for college. I can’t help but feel a twinge of sadness when I see my baby growing up. This does happen to other moms right?

I know it happens in reverse. When children are older, the parents look at them and see the child inside. That feels a little more normal but maybe it’s just another version of this affliction.

Being a parent means loving someone more than life itself. As much as you understand that they are going to grow up, it’s hard to watch. I have to make a conscious effort to enjoy the milestones and not constantly be thinking about how each of these steps is just one more step out the door for my little girl. It makes me feel kind of crazy. My husband does not seem to be afflicted with this disease. Each time she reaches a new stage in her development, he is excited for her. Her first word, her first step. He is excited, a normal response.

Meanwhile, I am bawling. That’s what I call Mom Crazy. I don’t feel it all the time and I am sure that now that I have a few mornings a week to myself, I’ll get over it. But this morning, it happened again.

I feel like I finally understand my mother. Which is kind of neat considering that today is her birthday.

So, Happy Birthday Mom. I get it now.


View Comments (8)
  • Totally there with you Jen! My husband and I were watching the end of the movie The Kids Are Alright and when they hugged their daughter as they left her at college I started bawling. Heaving bawling, the kind with snot running down my face because the idea of Oliver leaving for college is unacceptable! My husband said he thought I was getting ahead of myself since he is 2 🙂 The weird thing was how fast the tears came. Ah well, guess I’m mom crazy too!

    • Rachel- it’s good to hear from you. I saw on FB that you were in MO recently and got to see little Ethan Greatacre (or Longhouse?). I have decided that it is biological in nature. Tears just come with motherhood.

  • My husband started tearing up at ToyStory 3 because the kid was leaving for college. So it’s not just Moms. Whenever I discuss how our oldest will start kindergarten next year, he immediately wants to change topics. I, on the other hand, am excited and sad. I know that after a while I’ll get used to it, though.

    • Tabitha – I’m sure you’re right. I suspect my husband is just better at hiding his “crazy”.

  • Concur 100000%. Amongst those that have known me over the years, I am known for not showing my emotions. I was always the ‘stoic’ one. That is, until I had my son. Now – forgetaboutit! I cried when he went to pre-school. I cried when he lost his first tooth. Now, that he is barely able to curl up in my lap (though I am thrilled that he still WANTS to curl up in my lap every morning for our morning snuggle before school) I have to fight back the tears remembering that he used to fit in my arms…now, he’s almost up to my shoulder. Tears of joy at the young man he is becoming. Tears of sadness that in so few years he will actually be a man. Cry, laugh, it is all because of love.

    • Angela – I had one of those today. My daughter is recently obsessed with how “tall” she is getting. She was sitting on my lap and my legs were extended and she extended hers above mine and then commented that her legs were almost as long as mine.

      The crazy thing is…they are! Then later, she stood next to me and said, “look Mommy, I’m as tall as your legs.” She was pointing out that her head is almost to my waist. I just about cried again!

      Love is a crazy thing.

  • Yes, yes! I can totally relate. My 2 year old started preschool last week and we (he) picked out a backpack the day before. That night he was of course obsessed with the backpack. At one point he walked away from me pulling the backpack along the floor, turned around and said “bye bye Mommy.” My mommy heart broke, b/c like you, I could see him in 16 years leaving for college. That image is forever burned in my mind. And yes, I cried at that moment, and I cried after dropping him off at preschool. Oh, how much more can our hearts handle?

    • Wendy – I guess what they say is true – the heart is a muscle that just gets stronger with use.

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