Your Dad Doesn’t Want Soap-On-A-Rope

Is there a worse holiday for stereotypically bad gifts than Father’s Day? I must have been 14 years old before I realized I didn’t have to get my dad Old Spice and new undershirts. What a great sport he was all those years.

It’s maybe a bit odd that such a culture has developed, because dads are the easiest people to shop for. (Maybe I’m just saying that because I am one.) Need some help this Father’s Day? Read on for some local places you can shop THIS WEEKEND.

He Already Has One of Those

It may not matter. There are many things you can keep giving fathers for the rest of their lives. Does Dad have a nice flashlight already? Give him another one. There may be one in his nightstand and one in his truck, but is there one in his home office desk drawer? See how that works?

How about a multi-tool, like a Swiss Army knife or a Leatherman? That’s Dad nirvana. Again, same deal. Maybe he carries one in his pocket. Maybe there’s one in his toolbox. Does he have one that can stay in the shed? Or in the storage box on the lawn tractor?

How about those full-size screwdrivers with the interchangeable, hex-ended heads? Your dad likes those. Yes. He does.

He’ll glow and grunt quietly to himself as he considers where his latest tool shall live. Maybe he’ll even demote his daily to a currently-empty location and start carrying the new one.

Check outLewter’s Hardware, U.G. White

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He Doesn’t Know About Those

This is a good category, because you stand a real chance of surprising him. One of the best presents I ever got my dad was a streaming media box. He had no idea he could hook a little thingamabob up to his television and enjoy shows and music from the Internet.

Does your father have a laptop? Does he have any idea that with a Bluetooth mouse and keyboard (for example), he could use his gigantic man-cave television as a monitor for it?

…Or, He Could Always Use More of Those

If you have an already tech-savvy father, there may be some things he’d love to get from you that it would never occur to him to ask for. Is your dad into video editing? There is no such thing as a hard drive too big or too fast for that. Does he pass out a lot of his masterpieces once he finishes them? A spindle of new, blank DVDs would be thoughtful.

Rechargeable and/or specialty batteries? Flash memory? Ink cartridge refills? Photo paper?

Check out: GigaParts, Mac Resource
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He Would Love One of Those, But He’s Too Cheap to Get It Himself

This can be a rich vein of ore to mine indeed. If it hadn’t been for this line of thinking, my dad might never have had a watch that retailed for more than $50.

Does your dad buy a cheap string trimmer every couple of years from a faceless box store, then throw it away when it breaks? Maybe he needs a good one from a real hometown dealer of quality equipment.

What have you seen your dad look at—maybe even pick up—but then dismiss with an “I’m not paying that!”? That’s classic gift territory.

Check out: Hill Lawnmower & Chainsaw, Osborne’s Jewelers, Lowe Mill Artists

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Oh Yeah, He Loves Those

Finally, there are always comestibles and potables, O thoughtful sons and daughters. Many dads appreciate good food and drink, and gift cards to places offering such are generally held in high regard. Make the gift card for enough, and you might even rate going with him!

Check out: Anaheim Chili, Stem & Stein

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Most of us dads would call you, our sons and daughters, our greatest gifts already. Come and hang with us a bit. That’s a great present itself.
If you want to bring a little something too, but you want to break out of socks and ties, then see above.

Happy Father’s Day, Rocket City Dads!